Baby,  Tips & Advice

Why I’m Still Co-Sleeping

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So somewhere around the 2-3 week mark our daughter decided she didn’t like her moses basket and cried nonstop unless she was on my V-shaped breastfeeding pillow either on my lap or my partners lap.

We used to work in shifts trying not to fall asleep until we found the Babymoov Cosy dream (here’s my review of the awesome thing!). Ever since then, our baby girl has slept in our king size bed inbetween us.

Our daughter turns one in a few weeks and she’s currently fast asleep next to me as I write this in bed.

Today I saw a bed sharing post on the baby forum I’m on and it was very comforting to see how many ladies are still happily Cosleeping with their babies.

We love Co-sleeping and it’s quite sad that I feel the need to justify it whenever anyone asks how she sleeps and whether she’s in her own room etc.

I’m still not sure why everyone is so obsessed with how and where babys sleep but hey ho.

Co-sleeping or bed sharing isn’t advised by the NHS or by the Lullaby Trust but there have been studies that show that bed sharing can be just as safe as the recommended sleep guidelines when done correctly.

Our daughter grew out of the Babymoov cosydream when she learned to roll and since then has been just in her pj’s or sleeping bag inbetween us. I get kicked or headbutted quite regularly but I don’t care – I’d miss her desperately if she weren’t there.

I’m sure it’s fairly obvious to most that the reason baby’s want to sleep close to their parents is for reassurance. That reassurance works both ways. I love not having to have a baby monitor on, or be constantly checking on her. I can literally open my eye and see she’s OK and then be back to sleep. I wake at the slightest grumble from her and while some would say that’s a problem, for me it really isn’t. It’s reassuring to know that I’m here for her and that she is safe.

Of course, we do worry about her falling off the bed but for that reason we don’t leave her unattended unless she’s properly asleep and we’re just nipping to the loo.

It does mean we don’t have evenings to ourselves as we can’t leave her in bed alone – that’s literally the only downside.

After her first birthday we have agreed is when we will make the gradual transition to her sleeping in her cot. Mainly for us though, so we can have some time in the evenings to play xbox.

It’ll be a slow transition and will probably start by us putting her down for bed around 8-9pm in her cot and then her coming in with us when we come up at around 11pm ish. We’ll see how that goes but I’m in no rush.

I still cosleep because it’s easier for us. It’s easier to feed her back to sleep in the night, it’s easier to check on her, it’s easier in the morning when we all wake up and I don’t have to rush to get out of bed. It’s easier for a lot of reasons.

Parenting is bloody hard work so if I can make the sleep part easier, I’m bloody well going to!

Do you bedshare?

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4 Comments

  • Tori

    I would forgo the cot all together, my daughter just turned one and sleeps in a single bed. It means if she’s poorly or just needs me to stay then I can! But normally I can leave when she drifts off and get that all important alone time with my fiancé.
    We used to co-sleep on a mattress on the floor, I just could never get her down in the cot. Once she was happily able to get on and off of things we moved to the bed, it has a bed guard so she can’t roll off in her sleep!
    When I first started going back to my own bed she would come and find me immediately if she woke up, but she is slowly getting used to the fact that I’m not far and will come and settle her back down of she needs it.
    I loved co-sleeping and we still share the bed for a little bit most nights but I am also glad to be back in my bed… Even if my partner hogs all the duvet!

    • Eleanor

      I was actually thinking about this the last few days. I think we’ll probably end up going straight to her bed rather than the cot. We have a bed guard on our king size bed now and it’ll fit her cot bed once we convert it. I think we’ll be putting her into her bed to sleep eventually and skipping the cot altogether. Chances are when she wakes she’ll come and find me – she is getting pretty good at climbing now so won’t be long.

  • Liz

    Same here! Although we’ve modified a cot to go next to our bed so he always sleeps on my side not between us. We all sleep really well like this. When I suggested trying to gradually move him into his own room it was actually my husband who looked a bit sad and said he’d really miss him! Baby (11 months) does have his own cot in his own room and he will normally sleep in there for a couple of hours in the evening before coming into our bed so we have an ‘alone time’ window if we wish! The obsession with getting babies into their own rooms and to sleep through the night is definitely cultural. In many parts of the world cosleeping is just normal practice.

    Ultimately every family should do whatever works best for them and not feel they have to justify their choice to anyone else.

    • Eleanor

      Haha that sounds familiar. When we tried to put our daughter down in the cot, my other half always moans and says it “feels weird” without her in the bed with us! Softies! Definitely agree, we should just all do as we please – we know our babies and we know our families and what works for us better than anyone else!

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